I had a really interesting conversation with a friend today. She is deliberating about returning to full time work. Just for a couple of years, as a way to knock off the mortgage mainly.
Her husband is all in favour. Like most men, he sees reward in increased income.
But, he also likes nice things - believes that if you work hard you're entitled to spend hard.
She sees two years of slog as an investment in the future but wonders if he will see it as an advantage for the present.
And so, for the just about the first time in their 20 year marriage, they're arguing about money.
I've heard it all before. I've had those arguments all before.
No matter how much discussion or negotiating goes on, invariably someone ends up feeling like their point of view is being usurped.
It's one of the small (and it is pretty small) benefits of being a single. My money is my own. If I don't have enough, it's my responsibility to find more. If I want to work hard and then spend it all, then I can. If I want to work hard and keep it, I can do that too. I am not responsible to another for my spending decisions. There's some freedom in that. One less thing to argue about.
I wonder, will I ever be happy to share financial responsibility with another again?
Does it matter?