a cynical look at 10 things you should have learned about relationships but if you're reading this you probably still haven't

1. We've got lots in common so that's a great start, right?  Well yes, but I've got lots in common with my best friends husband too, doesn't mean we should have got together instead.   Are the things in common hobbies, or core values?
2. He had sex with me, so he must really like me?  Ah, no, that means he probably just really likes sex.
3. She was introduced to me by friends so I'm sure it's going to be great. What your point? Just because they like you, and they like her, doesn't mean you're good for each other
4. We don't have a whole lot in common, but there's amazing chemistry.  And?
5. She ticks every box on my (''non existent'') checklist.  Well except one little thing....  And what is that? If it's a deal breaker, what are you doing with her?  If it's not, chuck out the list and count your blessings
6. She's got a bit of a rough relationship history but I'm prepared to take the risk.  Why?  What makes you think it will be different this time?  It might be - but proceed with caution.
7. At the end of the day, there's pretty much no decent men out there in my age bracket so I need to just be happy with what I have.   Yeah, great start....settling is doomed from day one.  Let that guy in your age bracket go find someone who really wants him.
8. She's got some big issues, but she's in counselling so I think it will be fine.  It's not like she needs rescuing or anything.  Right...and you're not the rescuing type are you...
9. I feel sad for him - every other woman he's ever been with treated him really badly and he's been really wounded by it.  So that's why he's a bit mistrustful of me.  Is that so? And you know this how? Because he told you?  If there was ever a red flag, this is it.
10. I know she's only just a couple of months out of a long term relationship but she's assured me she's done with the other guy, and really over him.   Uhuh.  If you're wanting a serious relationship, don't ever, ever, EVER be the transition guy.  The likelihood of success is low.  Unless you're wanting transition. Then at least you know it won't last long.

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