Tuesday, 17 April 2012

love at first sight

Do you believe in love at first sight?

According to the research (well, accordingly to the google search i did anyway), it's a guy thing.  Men decide pretty much straight away whether they are attracted to a woman (that's the male version of falling in love apparently).  I know several men who say they ''fall in love a little every day''.  They're not talking about the ''i met my life partner today'' thing, it's just a face value, I'd like to get to know YOU kind of feeling.

Women take a little longer - anything up to a month or more supposedly.  It is, according to the experts - oops I mean, other bloggers out there, necessary for a woman to know a man before she falls in love with him.  But I think if women are really truly honest, they would say that whilst they might not have ''known'' they had met their true love at the first meet, they certainly knew if it was a possibility!  It's about not necessarily knowing who a YES is, but certainly filtering out the NO''s...

So bearing this in mind,  I'd like to add my two cents.

Firstly let me define falling in love:
- falling in love is not the same as really truly loving someone
- falling in love is probably closer to lust than even to like
- falling in love is the bit that gets your hormones racing
- falling in love is the easy part, it's growing in love and staying in love that takes effort and time
- falling in love can be quick, falling in like takes longer

I'd like to suggest that falling in love gives one enough burst of feel-good to be motivated enough to get to know someone properly - and then work out if you actually LIKE them.  Falling in love makes you feel good - it gives you energy for long late night conversations, and enough rose-tint to see past annoying habits - at least for a little while - and start to learn about the person you're looking at.  

Sure there are times when love ''grows'' from a friendship, but I think THAT is the exception not the rule.

So, I'd say, yes love at first sight is possible.  It might not be love in the long lasting sense.  It might turn out to be a false alarm or it might mask reality for a while.  But why not call it love anyway?

Happy ever after? Well, that's a topic for another time.


  1. Your post definitely got me thinking. Is "falling in love" simply having chemistry with someone and then later you have to get to know him/her? Is it simply "making the cut" and then the hard part starts? Or, is it only "Yummy! I want to get me some of that!"--only to be let down later?

  2. in this case I'm saying that really the ''falling in love'' is the chemistry/infatuation bit. but i still think thats the first step. after all if you don't do that the likelihood of having the will or energy to take things further is unlikely to be there.