Saturday, 26 May 2012

why I'm grumpy today

I'd like to blame it on the weather. Which isn't helping because it's cold. And wet.  I'd like to say it's because I'm missing my kids (actually I am, a little). I'd like to say it because I had too late a night last night and too early a morning today (I did, but it was worth it).

But actually the things that are making me grumpy this evening - and there are several - are:

- my annoying habit of reading dating advice blogs and fuming at the madness of them.  No ones happy
- hearing yet another person, married 20 or more years, preaching that marriage takes WORK and of course ANY one can be happily married for ever if only they understand that.  Usually the same people like to add ''I think you should just accept being single for now'' or some other pacifying type comment meant to make me feel better about my latest dating disaster, which is so NOT helpful either.
- the disillusioning remarks made to me by single men over the past few days

I get the dating advice blogs - what a great way to make a living! Write a book, add a blog and peddle them on a website where people can share their war stories and get ''advice'' from someone about why they are still single.  It's always the same advice - don't put up with rubbish, stop being so nice, be nicer, women be feminine, men be manly.  yeah yeah.

And having been married I already know it's hard work, thanks anyway.  And how DARE anyone preach to me about why their marriage is so successful and mine wasn't.  Nothing makes me feel more of a failure.  The reality is, NO ONE signs up to marriage expecting it to end. But some do.  And its tough enough dealing with that, without being offered sage advice from people who have never experienced a marriage ending themselves.   And of course they can comment from afar about the benefits of being single - when they have no recent experience of that either.  NOT.

And finally...why? why!?  I understand that some remarks are gauche attempts at small talk, that guys get nervous too, but I REALLY don't need to hear about how useless women are, are there are no good ones out there, and how forgettable most are (including me.).  Talk about how to make a girl feel special.

Grizzle over.  Thanks for reading:)

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